Friday, October 3, 2014

October 3 Day 64

No bear sightings today that anyone shared. But that doesn't mean the bear isn't out there. Our trash can is still down at the street (about 120 feet of a lane with no escape route) - I don't know if I should go get it or just bring a whistle and air horn when I go.  Yes, I have an air horn canister. The deer loved it, the neighbors did not.

I am watching my salvia slowly drop all the blossoms- it is so SAD for me. I love my salvia- I will sorely miss my little hummingbirds that have swarmed to it all summer. I really don't like winter- everything is so dead and worse, white. My favorite poet is Christina Rossetti. She summed it all up nicely :  and you're thinking "what does a Christmas carol have to do with Lynn hating winter?".  Well, it is the poem's imagery:
In the bleak mid-winter, frosty wind made moan, earth stood hard as iron, water like a stone...
and that is why I don't like winter. If snow just fell in colors, that would be better.

This hymn comes in two versions that I know of- the Holst and the Darke. I prefer the Darke. I think it is prettier. It is the only version I've sung- so my conductors must have liked it more also.

I have no idea why I'm talking about Christmas carols or winter. It isn't winter yet. And I have learned that I should be grateful for each day.  And I am. So when I complain about winter, take it with a grain of snow.

Bill O'Reilly wrote a book about Killing Patton. I remember my adoptive father telling me that the soldiers hated Patton, and it was commonly believed that he was conveniently allowed to die. I'm not sure what the logistics would be for that, and I was too little to ever question my dad. I might read it just to see how O'Reilly tries to explain it.

I have watched one VHS to external drive old home video that particularly surprised me and touched me.  My adoptive mother was holding the baby Ryan and giving him a bottle, and my adoptive father was there. Within 3 years of that video, my father died. That was the only video of him. And my mother was so sweet with Ryan- he smiled for her, which was a pretty new event.  Later, on the same tape is my adoptive brother's first wife, Marsha.  A year after that video was done, she would walk out of his life and her daughter's life and disappear for 12 years. He divorced her for desertion and remarried a woman with a child.  She came back remarried and educated and was a registered nurse. She wanted to be in her daughter's life again.  I encouraged my brother to let her back in- I know what it is to wonder about your mother. He finally did- but then a year later, Marsha was murdered by her current husband's brother. He was looking for money to buy drugs and he just shot her in the doorway.  Then he killed himself.

  A few years ago, my adoptive brother died, too. My niece has been okay- but I never see her. She was in the Pentagon on 9/11 (because she joined the military after college). But she survived. She has 3 kids and seems to be very happy with her family. So, seeing Marsha on the video, swimming with her little girl and my brother, I try to look for signs that she was planning on leaving or was terribly unhappy.  I don't know. I liked her. My mother raised Robin for years because my brother couldn't work and do that, too. My mother was 72 and spent 4 years raising a toddler. TMI?

Anyway, it is hard to believe how much your life can change when it seems that life doesn't have to be so complicated. And yet, it is.

I am waiting for Alex to get home- we are going to see Gone Girl. In Seattle. And if we don't leave in about 20 minutes, we will miss the opening. Dang!!!!!

So this is my most random post of all of the 99 days- I doubt I could top it.

I am taping Double Jeopardy- my favorite movie with crazy Ashley Judd in it and the guy who is in every movie but you don't know his name.  (Bruce Greenwood- which sounds like a cemetery in NOLA). Alex says I love revenge movies. He's right.

have a great Friday night!

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